Should Britain run Australia again?

In the last eleven years no Australian Prime Minister has completed a full term in office. As they can’t govern themselves perhaps they should consider reverting to British rule. Consider the advantages. MPs get to keep dual citizenship and their jobs. Farmers can relocate their businesses to the more suitable British climate and use the federal drought relief funds instead of EU subsidies. New Zealanders get freedom of movement and jobs vacated by EU workers.

Britain solves its overcrowding by exporting half the population to places with familiar names like Brighton, Ipswich, Warwick, Newcastle and Swansea. There’s a thriving drug culture to help them feel at home and the locals get a more generous welfare system that’s easier to cheat. They could transport convicts again because Australia has space to build prisons. And no more Ashes humiliation for either side as they combine to compete financially with India.

Britain can’t claim longevity for its Prime Ministers either, so the new empire would be governed by Queen Elizabeth II. With a succession plan and political stability, the offer is there to include other former colonies such as America. A British Union of once great powers and Australia.

 

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